The best of adtothebone (Clayton Hove)

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1. 

   ♬ It's five o'clock somewhere. ♬
   
   Oh, crap. That somewhere is here! Stupid mornings.
   [7 hours, 58 minutes ago, faved by 1] [at twitter]

    
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2. 

   New details on the accelerating Prius story - the driver has been ID'd as Bigfoot with Nessie riding shotgun.
   [21 hours, 17 minutes ago, faved by 1] [at twitter]

    
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3. 

   Liquid smoke is one of our language's spiffier oxymorons.
   [23 hours, 41 minutes ago, faved by 2] [at twitter]

    
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4. 

   This Theraflu brand is the worst schnapps ever.
   [1 day, 16 hours ago, faved by 2] [at twitter]

    
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5. 

   TJMaxx just announced that it is changing its name to The Ed Hardy Outlet'n'More Store.
   [2 days, 3 hours ago, faved by 1] [at twitter]

    
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6. 

   I have a theory about empirical evidence.
   [2 days, 5 hours ago, faved by 1] [at twitter]

    
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7. 

   Ahh. So this is the difference between day formula cold medicine and night formula cold medicine. Bugger.
   [2 days, 11 hours ago, faved by 1] [at twitter]

    
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8. 

   I'm not sure if it's the cold medicine or the Oscars, but...
   [2 days, 15 hours ago, faved by 1] [at twitter]

    
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9. 

   Why isn't rugby played on rugs?
   [2 days, 17 hours ago, faved by 1] [at twitter]

    
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10. 

    I need to scamper more.
    [2 days, 18 hours ago, faved by 1] [at twitter]

     
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11. 

    When your neighborhood liquor store's name is "LIQUOR" & it's next door to "PAWN", it's really time to consider a move.
    [2 days, 22 hours ago, faved by 1] [at twitter]

     
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12. 

    [Sni..!] ... [Sni..!] ... [Sniiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii..!] ...
    
    Darn. Still no Wolverine claws.
    
    Or girlfriend.
    [3 days, 1 hour ago, faved by 2] [at twitter]

     
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13. 

    You ever get the urge to go around all day talking like Jar Jar Binks? No? Um, me either.
    [3 days, 4 hours ago, faved by 1] [at twitter]

     
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14. 

    What's that, Farmville fan?
    
    You need help fertilizing your crops?
    
    Try pooping on your keyboard.
    [3 days, 4 hours ago, faved by 15] [at twitter]

     
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15. 

    Local TV weather forecast for the week: "MORE CLOUDS THAN SUN" And the week after that? I'm guessing "STILL ONLY ONE SUN"
    [3 days, 5 hours ago, faved by 6] [at twitter]

     
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16. 

    It seemed like a good idea at the time. - http://adtothebone.tumblr.com/431825634
    [3 days, 12 hours ago, faved by 1] [at twitter]

     
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17. 

    Remember the good old days when toilet paper rolls actually fit on your toilet paper holders? Ahh, memories.
    [3 days, 15 hours ago, faved by 1] [at twitter]

     
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18. 

    My improv'd recipe turned out ok, but not good enough to woo the ladies with "And tonight, we dine on Chicken Garbanzo!"
    [3 days, 17 hours ago, faved by 1] [at twitter]

     
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19. 

    I'd like to rebrand skinny jeans as improbable jeans.
    [3 days, 20 hours ago, faved by 8] [at twitter]

     
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20. 

    "...hopefully."
    [3 days, 21 hours ago, faved by 1] [at twitter]

     
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