The best of StephenAtHome (Stephen Colbert)

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1. 

   my one complaint about the crisis garden, where are the meat and gun seeds?
   [14 hours, 27 minutes ago, faved by 1] [at twitter]

    
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2. 

   voters will reward democrats who vote against healthcare just like in '94, when they offered them lucrative lobbying jobs
   [14 hours, 34 minutes ago, faved by 1] [at twitter]

    
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3. 

   eric massa appeared so crazy on his segment with glenn beck, that fox gave him his own show
   [14 hours, 38 minutes ago, faved by 1] [at twitter]

    
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4. 

   Sometimes I wonder, "what would Jesus tweet?" But you can't say much with 140 characters of Aramaic
   [23 hours, 32 minutes ago, faved by 3] [at twitter]

    
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5. 

   can't believe annie leonard thinks americans have too much stuff. someone should buy her a ronco stuff organizer
   [1 day, 14 hours ago, faved by 1] [at twitter]

    
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6. 

   americans eat corn all day and drink beer all night. sharks should consider us their kobe beef
   [1 day, 14 hours ago, faved by 2] [at twitter]

    
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7. 

   who needs health insurance? airport security provides FREE full body scans. not even a co-pay!
   [1 day, 14 hours ago, faved by 3] [at twitter]

    
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8. 

   republicans should refer to health care as "needlethon 2010" and start calling hospitals "forced medicine camps"
   [1 day, 14 hours ago, faved by 1] [at twitter]

    
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9. 

   vice president biden visited Israel today. I had no idea the acela had service there
   [2 days ago, faved by 1] [at twitter]

    
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10. 

    i was shocked to find out that sandra bullock's "the blind side" had nothing to do with horrendous traffic accidents
    [2 days, 2 hours ago, faved by 1] [at twitter]

     
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11. 

    Tom Hanks has a new miniseries about World War II. But he didn't make one about World War I so how will anyone be able to follow the plot?
    [2 days, 14 hours ago, faved by 2] [at twitter]

     
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12. 

    President Obama has stopped trying to cooperate with the GOP on healthcare. It's a breakthrough. "Stop trying" was the Republicans best idea
    [2 days, 14 hours ago, faved by 1] [at twitter]

     
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13. 

    so excited about my office oscar pool - not every office has a pool full of dead guys named oscar
    [3 days, 19 hours ago, faved by 5] [at twitter]

     
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14. 

    what's a five-letter word for "trivial 140-character communication?"
    [5 days ago, faved by 12] [at twitter]

     
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15. 

    would run for governor of NY, but I don't think I have the necessary criminal record
    [5 days, 22 hours ago, faved by 8] [at twitter]

     
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16. 

    america is fed up with washington. and that's saying something. it takes a lot to get us full
    [6 days, 2 hours ago, faved by 3] [at twitter]

     
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17. 

    stared into my freezer for an hour this morning. I miss the olympics.
    [1 week ago, faved by 35] [at twitter]

     
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18. 

    starbucks is really blazing a trail with new 31-oz drink. of course, that trail leads straight to the restroom
    [1 week ago, faved by 5] [at twitter]

     
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19. 

    no wonder why greece is facing economic ruin. they're always lighting their cheese on fire
    [1 week ago, faved by 5] [at twitter]

     
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20. 

    just four days until the oscars, so it's about time for the red carpet coverage to begin
    [1 week ago, faved by 3] [at twitter]

     
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