The best of Havenwar (Cederic Havenwar)

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1. 

   Mother, I want to thank you for all the great things you have done for me. Like dying.
   [4 months ago, faved by 1] [at twitter]

    
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2. 

   I am the new generation of pack-rat... I have more old IM accounts running than I have people I talk to.
   [4 months ago, faved by 1] [at twitter]

    
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3. 

   My wife just chugged her rum & coke and burped "I Love You". Three years, and still as romantic as the first time we met.
   [4 months ago, faved by 1] [at twitter]

    
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4. 

   I have reason to believe my wife might secretly be The Saint. http://twitpic.com/1li3lm
   [4 months ago, faved by 1] [at twitter]

    
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5. 

   "Take it up the bum for Jesus!" Being an atheist saves my ass again.
   [4 months ago, faved by 1] [at twitter]

    
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6. 

   In the case of invasion I am fairly sure we have enough marmite in the cupboard to not only repel the invaders, but make them cry.
   [4 months ago, faved by 1] [at twitter]

    
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7. 

   I'm not saying that I'll never grow up, I'm just saying confiscating my super soaker isn't gonna work now that I can buy my own.
   [4 months, 1 week ago, faved by 1] [at twitter]

    
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8. 

   This morning people smiled and said hello rather than cross the street to avoid me. What kind of nightmare is this?
   [4 months, 2 weeks ago, faved by 1] [at twitter]

    
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9. 

   Note to self: don't shave drunk.
   [4 months, 2 weeks ago, faved by 1] [at twitter]

    
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10. 

    I am apparently so much of a "dog-person" that I don't recognise some people if they are not walking their dogs.
    [4 months, 2 weeks ago, faved by 1] [at twitter]

     
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11. 

    Two nights on a ship with cheap cuba libres and lightly clad women pretending to be cuban have taught me that my wife makes a softer pillow.
    [4 months, 2 weeks ago, faved by 1] [at twitter]

     
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12. 

    The road to anal is paved with good intentions.
    [4 months, 2 weeks ago, faved by 1] [at twitter]

     
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13. 

    Remember today; if you see someone smoking rollups, casually go stand to the left of them.
    [4 months, 3 weeks ago, faved by 2] [at twitter]

     
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14. 

    I was wondering why she was staring at my hat, until I realised it was all I was wearing.
    [4 months, 3 weeks ago, faved by 1] [at twitter]

     
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15. 

    Facebook is a lot like chlamydia. If all your friends have it, and you don't, well... There's really no good outcome, is there.
    [4 months, 3 weeks ago, faved by 1] [at twitter]

     
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16. 

    I think the swedish view on marriage is made quite clear in that the word "Gift" translates to both "married" and "poison".
    [5 months ago, faved by 1] [at twitter]

     
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17. 

    Every time I feel like crap after overdosing on icecream I realize it's probably a good thing I don't do drugs. Much.
    [5 months, 3 weeks ago, faved by 1] [at twitter]

     
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18. 

    Back on linux again... It would be nice if it "just worked", but that's just bringing my expectations to female levels.
    [5 months, 3 weeks ago, faved by 1] [at twitter]

     
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19. 

    "Might be dead" the note said. From the volume of the snoring I'm going to guess "might be drunk". I'll play some Rammstein and we'll see.
    [6 months, 1 week ago, faved by 1] [at twitter]

     
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20. 

    I wake my wife up in the morning so she won't have to wake to the alarm. Which is nice. Except my snooze button is starting to get tender.
    [6 months, 2 weeks ago, faved by 2] [at twitter]

     
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