The best of Capsaholic (Rick)

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1. 

   For some reason I have a FUCKING CARLY SIMON SONG STUCK IN MY HEAD TODAY!
   [1 month, 1 week ago, faved by 1] [at twitter]

    
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2. 

   ♪ Your so anal, I'll bet that misspelling of "you're" is driving you bat shit crazy ♫
   [1 month, 1 week ago, faved by 2] [at twitter]

    
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3. 

   I think I just saw a butterfly burst into flames...
   [1 month, 1 week ago, faved by 1] [at twitter]

    
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4. 

   The hottest chick in the metro station is always on the other side of the tracks.
   [1 month, 1 week ago, faved by 1] [at twitter]

    
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5. 

   Even on twitter, I'm an outcast.
   
   I win the internet!
   [1 month, 1 week ago, faved by 1] [at twitter]

    
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6. 

   DO YOU UNDERSTAND THE WORDS THAT ARE COMING OUT MY TWEETS?
   [1 month, 2 weeks ago, faved by 1] [at twitter]

    
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7. 

   No, it's not "Tai Chi."
   
   I'm removing a spider web.
   [1 month, 2 weeks ago, faved by 1] [at twitter]

    
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8. 

   I could spend hours listing movies "2012" ripped off. The only thing that's going to end in 2012 is Hollywood.
   [1 month, 2 weeks ago, faved by 1] [at twitter]

    
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9. 

   I can not tolerate intolerant people.
   [1 month, 2 weeks ago, faved by 1] [at twitter]

    
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10. 

    Too many Bieber fan club tweets on the leader-boards. Ugh! Isn't it past their bed time?!
    [1 month, 3 weeks ago, faved by 2] [at twitter]

     
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11. 

    I just visited the Japanese leader-board.
    
    I raffed out roud.
    [1 month, 3 weeks ago, faved by 3] [at twitter]

     
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12. 

    Oh well, no Holland Day tomorrow.
    [1 month, 3 weeks ago, faved by 1] [at twitter]

     
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13. 

    Sometimes, when I'm feeling lazy & stuff, I go to favstar and star people who are nice to me. Does that bother you?
    [1 month, 3 weeks ago, faved by 2] [at twitter]

     
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14. 

    At least LeBron got them to STFU about Tiger.
    [1 month, 3 weeks ago, faved by 1] [at twitter]

     
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15. 

    Isn't LeBron an old Chrysler?
    [1 month, 3 weeks ago, faved by 1] [at twitter]

     
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16. 

    Off the grid for 3 days and not one of you fuckers missed me!?
    [1 month, 3 weeks ago, faved by 1] [at twitter]

     
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17. 

    Now for my next trick, I'm going to disappe
    [1 month, 4 weeks ago, faved by 1] [at twitter]

     
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18. 

    KFC was out of honey-mustard so I had to mix my own.
    That's the closest I've come to cooking since that time in 98 when my microwave broke.
    [2 months ago, faved by 1] [at twitter]

     
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19. 

    Heard at KFC.
    
    Customer: Two wings and a biscuit.
    
    Employee: Order from the menu, we're not the wing store ma'am.
    [2 months ago, faved by 1] [at twitter]

     
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20. 

    Happy Canada Day! Thanks for hockey, Rush & the current cold front we're enjoying.
    [2 months ago, faved by 1] [at twitter]

     
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